One of the biggest testaments of my faith journey happened after a great disappointment. A time when I thought I had my life path all figured out, and in writing…literally. I had signed up for 4 years of the US Army with a plan to retire at 37. I was a natural on the range, I aced all my academic challenges, even the physical challenges until my legs decided not to play along. I ended up with stress fractures in both of my femur bones. I passed my final run in basic, but once I got to AIT I could not hit the mark on the run time. I was given many chances after months of healing time. I would write letters home and beg my family to pray for me to pass that rest so I could move on to my permanent duty station. I received a letter from a lady I had never met. It was a friend of my mom’s mother. She told me it was time for me to pray for what God wanted for me, not what I wanted for myself. To pray to accept failure as a path to what God has called me to. So I did. I prayed that if I didn’t pass the final test that I could learn from the experience and trust that God had something different, and better for me.
I missed it by seconds. My Drill Sargent had gotten to know me because I had been a holdover for months and that meant I didn’t leave the barracks very often and did a lot of admin work in his office. He told me he could pass me and I would move along, but he wasn’t going to because even though I had the heart of a soldier, my body (and mind) would suffer in the long term. So I went home. It was the end of a dream. I was disappointed and discouraged, but I was also on the path to discover who God is and what He has done for me. I haven’t talked about that much in my lifetime but knowing people I love may be discouraged because something didn’t go as they had hoped or planned, it makes me want to share that part of my story. Stop praying for what you want for yourself and pray for what the Lord has for you. He is trustworthy!

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
‭‭James‬ ‭1‬:‭2‬-‭4‬ ‭ESV‬‬